Plans are set...

I have my hysteroscopy scheduled.  I decided that it would be better to have my RE do it.  I just don't trust my GYN anymore.  I feel like she was covering her ass when she said it was a polyp.  I have a feeling it could be both.  This whole week has been spent bleeding.  Now my thyroid is out of whack as well.  It's going overactive and I feel miserable lately.  Why can't anything go right lately.  Hoping that once I have the hysteroscopy I can move forward even if my thyroid is out of whack.  I guess I'll have to wait and see.  I'm just so sick of waiting.

Crazy week....

This has been a crazy week for us.  We traveled to the clinic on Sunday for a Monday procedure and consult.  During the consult we asked about how many embryos we could put back in.  Since I have diabetes and it's an added complication and unless the quality of the embryos are not good he's recommending one embryo.  We'll take that recommendation since a twin pregnancy could end badly for me. Hysteroscopy went well.  My Dr was able to remove the polyp.  He said it was very small and my uterus looked great.  J also had a semen analysis done along with freezing him sperm.  Needless to say we got a lot done.  Since there was a blizzard heading to the North East, we thought it best to go home same day.  We were both pretty exhausted but we made it home.  I slept most of the day away on Tuesday and Wednesday we did some running around to get ready for J's job fair.  He left today.  I asked him the usual about being packed up and he said yes, yes, yes.  So imagine my surprise when he calls me from Dallas and says "I don't know what to do".  Then he says he left his white shirt and tie at home.  I was mortified.  On the plane down he sat in the JS and one of the crew has an interview with Spirit coming up.  He said he went to the job fair in November and it was a mini job interview.  So he's panicking about that too.  The job fair details say suit and tie.  So needless to say that without that he might as well not go.  Luckily he was able to get a courtesy car to a mall and he shopped quickly.  I gave him the size shirt so he could just find the size and go.  Now he's reviewing the interview gouges to see about the questions they might ask.  Living with J can be challenging and stressful.  Today I also got my contract from Attain.  I will have to wait for J to come home because I need his signature and copy of his license. I can't believe it's happening so quickly.  My nurse said it could be finished by March/April.  I just so excited and hopeful.  

Getting all my ducks in a row....

I've taken the next step.  I've reapplied for the fertility loan a few days ago.  I was able to just email the same person who I worked with back in April.  I feel like a person when I speak to her.  She understands.  She's been through the same process and knows how stressful it can be.  We got our loan just at a higher interest rate because our credit scores have dropped.  I don't even care.  All I cared about was getting the loan and now that is set.  It's been on my mind for the last month now.  I've been holding off because I wanted to see some things improve but now that I'm past most of the testing I needed done, I thought it would be good to get started.  Next step is to see what's in store for J's schedule for January and get that hysteroscopy done.  We've narrowed down our decision on a donor as well.  Once we get started, things will move quickly.  Hopefully, nothing will get in our way and we'll have our take home baby some time next year.  I'm not sure how long it will take to get another recipient for our donor but hopefully it will happen in February.  I'm getting anxious now.  

Emotional and lost....

Things aren't going as planned.  My mammogram do-over means a biopsy needs to done.  J was with me when I went for the second mammogram.  The radiologist (a chia head Doogie Houser) delivered the bad news.  He had no bedside manner.  You have a micro calcification in your right breast and you need a biopsy.  Any questions?  I just sat there nodding and shaking my head.  Then he left.  The tech handed me something to fill out and she kept rubbing my back saying this happens often it's usually nothing.  I broke down and cried.  I'm just so emotional.  They called me by the time I got home to schedule a consult with a surgeon.  We went there today.  I'm now scheduled for a biopsy next Thursday.  My stress level is so high right now.  I feel physically drained.  I'm terrified of the procedure and the final report.   I'm supposed to go to SC on that following Monday for the hysteroscopy.  I'm not sure if I should do it or not. I still have a few days to figure that part out.  I'm just so tired and at the same time I have heart palpation's.  I don't know how to get through this. 

And the hits keep on coming....

I'm trying to remain calm but inside I'm all in knots.  I have to go back for another mammogram on Monday.  Something was wrong with the film or they saw something on the film.  In any case it would be nice if I could get a straight answer instead of having to come up with things it could be in my head.  Then my nurse from the clinic called me.  My Dr wants to do a hysteroscopy and polypectomy.  She said it's not fertility related so insurance should cover it.  But I'm skeptical.  I remember the last time I had non-fertility testing done and I wound up paying because the billing department coded it as fertility and it wasn't covered because of that.  Then the billing department said they couldn't code it any other way so I wound up paying over $900.00 for that day.  This could cost over $5,000 so I'm not about to take any chances with that.  I got an email from the financial coordinator telling me the cost with insurance but she didn't have my insurance information so I don't know where that number came from.  I emailed her my insurance information and haven't heard back. Hopefully, she is checking with my insurance out and will get the cost approved.  I really like this clinic but have had such a hard time with the billing and financial department.  I won't be stuck with a bill like that.  If that happens it will set us back half a year and I'm not waiting anymore.  I want to move forward already.  I've waited long enough.  I've watched my friends, family and co-workers grow their families and it's my turn.