Healthcare and meds...

So, G had some crazy looking marks on her leg.  Possibly bug bites but I wanted to have it looked at since it was so many and so round. I was lucky to get an app the next day in the morning with her doctor.  We decided that since it was the Dr and not the NP we would ask the her questions about coming off the meds. When J mentioned it the nurse who checked us in she looked pissed off and was very combative.  I don't know why.  I'm not sure what she gained from acting like that.  She didn't want us to talk to the Dr about it because we have an app in Sept to review it.  But why was is it that she was so freaking angry about it.  If it was the NP, we would have just had her look at G's leg and we'd be done.  Anyway, we got a prescription to start her coming off the meds. We started on Saturday and by Sunday, we had a change of heart and gave her the extra dose.  Sunday and Monday were ugly days for G.  No self control at all.  I was terrified for her and anyone she would come in contact with.  She wasn't being bad.  Just so wild.  Anyway, she had an incident at school so we are now waiting to get with the pyschiatrist and we'll assess whats needed then.  So much for taking her off meds we didn't think worked anyway.  

Challenges...

I feel like I'm drowning in responsibilties. I get up at 6:30pm to get ready.  Then get G up to get ready.  We've started picking out clothes the night before to alleviate the struggle in the morning.  It seems to be working for now.  Then get her breakfast, put her bag together, get her meds together, pack her snack and water.  After that, we go back upstairs to brush teeth and wash face.  In between with her running to J to say hello and not do what she's supposed to do.  Finally all of are in the car and we drop her off.  Then, I get home, make my breakfast and coffee and work.  I do some side hustle and get my act together for my day job.  Now, I'm reminding J to do things, throwing in load of laundry, again reminding J to do things, working, figuring out dinner, keeping the kitchen clean, possibly pulling out the vaccum and going back to work, etc.  Now we are trying to get G off the current meds but it's all such a mess.  According to the doctor's office ,she should have been monitored every 3 months by the prescriber which we weren't aware of.  Anyway, just not happy these days with healthcare.  

Updates on our lives...

So we had a crazy July.  We took our little one to VA to stay with Grandma and Grandpa.  And J and I drove to NJ to have his surgery done.  It was really crazy, stressful, and exhausting. Hotel living and surgery don't mix well as well as travelling as much as we did.  G was not happy to be at Grandma and Grandpa's house.  She did get to meet her cousins in person.  They are her second cousins but they are her age.  She had the best time with them.  We had an extra 2 days in VA before we traveled home.  I spent as much time with G as I could.  We went to Surge and she had a great time climbing and jumping all afternoon.  She even got to have desert for lunch.  Not my idea but aparently there are no food options except for the pancake desert place in the mall.  So for dinner we had pizza and then she got to go play in the pool and her Aunt and Uncle's house. The next day was travel back home day.  Longest drive ever.  8 hours plus a car wreck that took over an hour to clear up just 500 feet away from us.  But we made it home and tried to get G under control.  Monday was orientation day with her teacher and Wednesday she started 1st grade.  We went to her therapist app as her behavior has been deteriorating lately.  Maybe it's all the traveling. Or J not being well.  Or just starting 1st grade.  Who knows.  She has good days and bad days.  The therapist is going to have a psychiatrist contact us to get her started with another medication.  In the meantime we have to wean her off of the current medication.  It's not really helping so better to get her off of it.  That's where we are right now.  I'm doing all the work.  Working full time, taking care of G, cooking, laundry, shopping, etc.  I have been looking into preparing and having ready meals ready to make.  Some will be in a jar that can cook with just water.  Others will be in a bag with all the ingredients ready to grab off the shelf and prep.  I have some things already that I like but meals in a jar is something we can use for long term storage as well has easy to go meals.  I joined Thrive Life and decided to become a consultant since I can get the lower prices for the products.  Plus, I really believe it being prepared and want to try harder to do that.  Covid got me that frame of mind and who knows what can happen.  I don't want to be unprepared for an emergency.  Anyway, that's where I am today. 

Anyone interested in Thrive Life, just click on Thrive Life.

Silly G

1st Day of 1st Grade

Crazy moments with my daughter...

So this past weekend, G and I went to the pool.  I love taking her there.  The temps are really hot and I thought it was all going ok.  G got sick in the car on Thursday last week so J and I worked to get the smell out and clean it up. It still needs a really good cleaning but it smells ok.  So fast foward to Saturday.  We went to the pool and G and I were leaving.  Somewhere, somehow, she put goldfish in the cap of her water bottle.  I'm not sure why.  But she opened it all the crumbs came out and I lost my cool.  I asked her why she did that instead of just taking the bag of goldfish.  I told her she can't eat in the car if she's going always make a mess that others clean up.  Anyway, she then threw her water thermos.  I drove home angry.  I got out of the car to go to the front door and open the garage from inside (remote wasn't working). I came out and she was stomping on my phone in the grass saying I locked her in the car and closed the garage.  She went into the house and J followed her.  She hugged him and he came out.  It was then that I realized the windshield was cracked.  Huge crack and it'll cost us 500 to fix.  He went back inside and said, you broke the windshield.  She then kept stomping on his feet to hurt him.  Then went back outside to continue to stomp on my phone.  She was out of control.  Was it hunger, was it the heat, was it exhaustion?  I don't know.  She's seeing a therapist as I write this.  I hope she can help.  We need help parenting her.  The rest of the weekend was glorious.  She becomes really scary when she acts like that so something isn't right with her. I hope this therapist can help.

Struggles...

I love J but he doesn't always realize he's doing damage to our daughter.  He keeps commenting that he doesn't know how long he'll live like this.  She hears this and I can only imagine whats going on her brain.  She's been super clingy too. I want Daddy, running into Daddy's room, I need Daddy.  It's been over and over again and he says something not right with her.  I want to say, it's you.  You keep telling her it's over for you and you are not going to live much longer.  Every car ride you talk about it with me in the front and her in the back and she hears it.  I say stop.  I don't respond to it anymore.  If I say don't say that, he gets mad and loses it.  It scares me as well.  I'm not immune to his impending death.  I think if keep saying it over and over, eventually you'll accomplish the goal of dying.  Always so negative.  I want my little girl to be ok but he scares me.  And I'm at a loss at how to get him to stop.

So far so good...

This has been G's first week at the new daycare.  So far we like what we see in the place.  The person who runs it, has a child with ADHD and understands all too well.  She's a published author on a childrens book about ADHD.  It's on my list to order.  It's called "My Running Mind" and I'm purchasing it on Amazon.  If anyone is interested in it, I've linked it to the amazon page.  They seem chaotic but yet have total control over the children.  G has been having issues and we've been seeing her in the zone lately.  But they handled it so well.  So much better than just "your daughter is really aggressive"  I keep thinking of that comment and it gets me super angry.  These people are in the business of taking care of children and G is a child.  Have they never managed a child that has ADHD?  I guess they like to be selective with the children they get.  Only those that sit still.  We won't talk about the little boy that asked G if she wanted to see his weenie?  That was G's fault too.  I keep wondering where the adults were while this and other things were going on.  Well, keep praying for my little one and that she's now at the daycare she fits in well with.