Medical issues....still!

J is still recovering from Covid.  Still has the A-fib.  Still scared his heart is going to just stop beating.  Last night, G was in bed and crying.  She wanted Daddy to stay with her.  She was scared because of Daddy's heart.  She was crying her eyes out and so scared.  It broke my heart to realize she was scared of what's happening to him.  I assured her that Daddy was going to be ok.  J came in and hugged her and said the same thing.  She finally went to sleep.  My poor little girl.  Too young to think of these things.  I just want to protect her from the world sometimes.  J is going to go to the Mayo Clinic and have a consult there.  I guess a second opinion would be a good idea before going through surgery on an organ you can't live without.

Medical problems...

So J spent 10 days in the hospital with Covid.  Wish they would have started some treatment but I guess suffering is what the Dr's and the state want.  He apparently went into afib a few times but they neglected to tell him about it.  When he looks back, he realizes now what happened was the afib.  But even when discharged from the hospital, it was never mentioned on the discharge papers or by any Dr or nurse.  They basically dumped him out by the ambulance bay.  And why like that is what I'd like to know.  It all seemed to be a huge stigma and punishment.  You didn't get the Covid vaccine and do as you were told to do, so now you are going to be treated like a piece of crap.  He got lectured longer about getting the vaccine than his current medical problems.  Now he has to have surgery to correct the heart problem.  So pissed about that right now.  He will be ok.  I just want our lives to go back to normal.  

My Girl is Home...

 What a day it was.  Got up at 4:30am to get ready.  Airport, through security, the pump went off so needed a pat-down.  Got breakfast, (smart move since I didn't get another chance to eat), gate, plane, take-off, land, run through the airport to find Grandparents and G.  Check her in and luggage, go back through security and same crap with a pat-down only now I have G and that's another level of panic.  But she did great for the most part.  Oh and I had the super heavy, I can't manage car seat with me to take on the plane.   A very nice passenger helped me get it on the plane.  Then we buckled and took off.  Now, after we landed I waited till everyone was off.  No flight attendant helped.  Told G to stay in the isle till I got back.  Took the seat off and the flight attendant said I can't return and why was I.  I told her I'm getting my child.  Sorry they were too stupid to see me dragging a car seat with nothing else off the plane.  They were rather busy laughing and talking.  Oh well.  Got G and made it out the jet bridge.  Then, strapped the car seat to my new 4 wheel helper.  G then strapped herself in and we made our way through the airport.  Got to the luggage and found it.  Called the car service and went on to the Chicago broken streets where everything went bad.  Note to self.  G can't be in the seat at this point.  Butt dialed J, my sister, and the driver.  Sweat from parts of my body I didn't know would sweat.  But, we were on our way home.  Got home, relaxed for a little, and then went to get G her COVID test.  What a day but my girl is now home and we are loving it.  

August 2021 = Covid

So it's been a hard month.  J brought Covid home from his trip.  Diagnosed on 8/3 and I got diagnosed on 8/5.  By Sunday, Jim was admitted to the hospital and put on oxygen.  I tried to take care of our very healthy 4-year-old, work my job, and take care of myself.  By 8/13 I arranged for my daughter to go stay with her Aunt, Uncle, and Grandparents.  She's been there ever since.  I miss her like crazy and want her to come home.  Jim is home now, but still having some heart issues so driving to get her is out of the question.  As of now, I'm taking a flight on Monday to go bring her home the same day.  I'm nervous, worried about problems with the airline, getting through security going, and coming home.  It's a lot to think about for one day of travel.  But my baby will be home.  I've had some insecurities come up lately too.  I know it's crazy.  But a long time ago, my best friend made comments that stung and still come up sometimes in my head.  I gave birth to her, I love her and I know in my heart that she loves me but after she was born, for the longest time, I doubted that she loved me.  My MIL made a comment.  It was an innocent comment but it brought back those doubts.  I don't blame my MIL for saying anything.  Well, I do blame her for carrying a scissor around with her so she can cut my daughter's hair the first chance she gets.  Trying to let it go but next time she goes to their house, I'm making it clear that cutting any piece of hair is off-limits.  It's not her place and I don't understand why she keeps doing it.  Anyway, I'm excited for her to come home.  

COVID....

 So hubby goes away from mid-July and returns on July 30th.  On July 31 he gets a call from his HR department telling him he came in close contact with someone who has tested positive for COVID.  If he got word the day before he wouldn't have come home.  Now, he's home, isolating in our bedroom.  Fever comes and goes along with body aches.  Since we didn't know till Saturday afternoon, lots of snuggles with the little one, and we slept in the same bed, touched the same things, etc.  Now I'm starting to feel ill but I'm also very stressed.  The little one is home for 2 weeks and I'm still trying to work full time.  haha on me. And I'm sleeping on the couch (kind of comfy) but does it matter at this point.  I'm fully exhausted and coughing a lot.   A little pressure on my chest comes and goes.  I need prayers that we will get through this.  I know the survival rate is 99% so I keep reminding myself of that.  

Trying new things...

So what I've realized on this journey is that it's always changing.  You have to push yourself all the time.  Keep at it.  Every day you must post.  I'm trying to keep up with 3x/day.  I redid my ad.  Some days I get results, some days I don't.  But I have to keep on trying and won't let that get me down.  I try to keep on being inspiring.  Try to engage more with the followers.  This is all the time.  Once I get buyers, it'll start to get easier.  My followers are growing.  It takes time to build up anything.  If it was easy, then everyone would do it.